Monday, August 07, 2006

Is it offense I am feeling?

Mitt Romney of Massachusetts, apologized this week for using the racial epithet "tar baby" at a Republican political gathering in Iowa over the weekend while describing a collapse in a Big Dig tunnel that killed a Boston woman on July 10. He said the best thing he could do politically is to "just get as far away from that tar baby" of a subject as he could.

Tar baby is a pejorative term referring to African-American children, especially girls, and was used by whites during American slavery. Today, the term has come to depict a sticky mess or situation, referring to the 19th-century Uncle Remus stories in which a doll made of tar was used to trap Brer Rabbit.

Eric Fehrnstrom, the governor's spokesman said, "The governor was describing a sticky situation. He was unaware that some people find the term objectionable, and he's sorry if anyone was offended." How could a man who is the governor of the diverse state of Massachusetts, and who wants to be president, not know this?

(this whole story can be found @ planetout.com)

In an interview with Ann Coulter, author of "Godless: The Church of Liberalism," on the July 27 edition of MSNBC's "Hardball" with host Chris Matthews, Coulter called former vice president Al Gore a "fag," and she hinted that Bill Clinton might be gay.

"How do you know that Bill Clinton is gay?" Matthews asked.

"He may not be gay, but Al Gore, total fag. No, I'm just kidding," Coulter stated. And in referring to Clinton, Coulter continued, "I mean, everyone has always known wildly promiscuous heterosexual men have, as I say, a whiff of the bathhouse about them."


WoW!!!

I do my best not to take offense at these kinds of things. Offense is a dish that I don't care for. It is a choice and a silly one in my opinion. What I do, is loose respect for the people who use these terms.

I have been faced with this issue alot this year. I mean people use the word Gay as a derogatory putdown. "that is so GAY!" meaning that it is stupid or wronge or demented. I think that it is a terrible phrase that inteligent people would do well to get out of their vocabulary. I don't mean to be on high moral ground here and say that I am better than others, it's just I loose alot of respect and like for people that I hear use such terms. There is no need for them, especially when there are a plethora of words out there that would better describe what you are trying to say. (listen to me, I sound like my aunt, "That is soo Vulgar!")

I think I need to take this down a notch.

about 2 weeks ago a good friend of mine used the term in my company while he was talking to me. He said something was Gay! and then imediately realized what he had done and backtracked. He said "I didn't mean Gay in the Homosexual way, I just meant gay in the High School, that is stupid way." or something to that effect. I was very sadened by this statement. I mean I truely like this person and have alot of respect for him and in fact talk to him about alot of stuff that I don't confide in alot of people. And that one statement really changed the dynamic of our friendship. I haven't opened up to him since then really and haven't even sought out his companionship outside of work because I lost alot of respect. Is this Offense? I think that some of it is. I mean I wouldn't be holding this much of a grudge if it wasn't. that makes it sound like I am angrier than I am, we are still friends and he is coming skydiving with me and I still have a great time with him. I just don't interact with him the same anymore, nothing tragic, I just wouldn't confide as much anymore.

What is even more funny is that Offense has been a big thing on Campus recently. One community member was almost crucified because of a skit they did at a talent show.

I don't tell my friend about my little issue because I don't want to be seen as someone who takes offense. Because I am really against that thought pattern. But I guess that I am not perfect. now I don't know what to do. talking to him will clear it up but will make it seem like he hurt me far more than he did. Especially now that it is about 2 weeks later.

I guess the key is to forgive.

dlb

1 Comments:

Blogger Ben Dover Jr. said...

if that's all it took for you to lose respect twards that guy you are gay!

1:14 PM  

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